18 months in Afghanistan

All white interviewees tearing apart President Obama's speech. Comparing it to W. Bush! No other president has lied to the greatest nation It wasn't until W cam along this country became the clown in the world. No other time in the history of the world during the industrial revolution has China, Japan, and India has run pass the U.S. More criticisms...no one questioned W like they are O even when the message of the mission was based on fact and truth. What if it isn't? People have gone from fear to hatred of Muslims to wanting to be pulled out to not wanting to fork the money into to pulling out to silence about Iraq.

I love hearing and listening to white men/people determine what happens to people who are considered by them as the " Other". Take your policies and laws off my body, my values, heritage, culture, religion, and my integrity. You have taken every opportunity for someone like me to succeed and sit next to you at the table where my voice weighed the same as your mouth does.

Go Charlie Rose: http://www.charlierose.com/

Hollow Glass Wall

I guess you didn't have the time to call me back. I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to do anything with me. I feel us pulling away into work or school. Leaving us with no time made for us. I don't want you to feel bad because I am guilty of this too. I don't want to make you feel a certain way enough to do something you don't authentically feel to be true. Cuz that's not going to make me feel good either.

                             We live together separate but in parallel with each other. 

As we drown ourselves into everything else that requires our attention maybe our relationship will just work itself out without us actually doing anything about it. 

Never thought it would come to a place where our relationship exists somewhere outside of us. 

The glass is so clear yet thick. I see you and I know you see me. let us fill this hollow glass wall that divides us with all our reasons so the wall may stand tall. 

One day that glass wall will fill up. Then what?

Top This Dave Letterman!

My TOP TEN LIST! 

1. I am getting too old to always make white people feel comfortable at the expense of my comfort.
2. I need verbal, physical, and mental support from white anti-racists-in-training.
3. We all should be angry.
4. It may not take all white people to change the construct of whiteness just a few really powerful, rich, and influential individuals like those during the civil rights movement.
5. White people, white bodies, and whiteness can be three different categories in themselves.  " I hate whiteness but I have come to love individual white people."- ?
6. To achieve peace, violence is needed to combat the violence of white supremacy. Just look at Gandhi and Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
7. Do not believe always what you believe to be true.
8. Whiteness is so smart,camouflaged, and a true chameleon when needed to sustain and perpetuate it's own self interest. 
9. Modern day racism is good, hard working, good intentioned, self righteous, religious fearing whites. It is very visible and colorful. It stems from birth to adulthood. The excuses help them sleep better at night and their own views about one's self racism.
10. The supposed post racism era is a ploy.

What are we to do with whiteness? I need no ally. I need no pitty. I need white people to look inward and self examine what is your whiteness and start from the beginning. This is how white people can help.

Day of Triumph

I've searched

                      near and far

                      across oceans

                      the other side of boundaries

to other universes

I search the depths of my mind

traveling through time

                          light

                          spaces in betweeen

                          folktales of ancestors

to

find

In this lifetime maybe in past

                                   future

                                   lifes

will we begin to understand answers to why

                                                            why not

                                                            why now

                                                            Why when

will happiness be justice to all not based upon race

                                                                     color

                                                                     creed

                                                                     sexuality

                                                                     religion

                                                                    gender

                                                                    fear

                                                                    power over

Oh what a beautiful day this will be

The day I will be impressed and proud

til that day I will wait

wait

wait

act

act

act

advocate

advocate

some more

educate

educate

learn

learn

some more

til this day cometh

shall I never rest

only to witness this day of triumph

                         

          

Slowly

Have you ever had every emotion traveling your body so fast beyond the speed of light
that the next universe could feel it too?

Something tells me people I meet during this life time were people I was with then.The gravitational pull is so intense fate had nothing to do with it. The kindred spirits are in utter dismay.

Valentine's Day

  I remember every day how I felt when I went alone to abort our baby, who was almost ten weeks old, at the clinic. I remember the way the clinic smelled, I felt cold, and scared!
Oh how I missed my baby.

Of course the best part were the righteous Christians outside of the clinic who were protesting, harassing me by telling me that I was a killer and murdering a life!

I remember a complete stranger holding my hand because she was paid to, not because she loved me. How the doctor sucked our baby right out of me with a machine. I heard the sound of the machine as if it were a vacuum. I could feel every part of the baby's body leave my womb and into the vacuum machine.

I just wanted to be knocked out of commission because I couldn't believe what just happened.  How I couldn't even say goodbye to him/her.  And when the baby was no longer there anymore. I knew it physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. My baby was gone! My little baby no longer had any life in him/her! The baby would have been one year and a month by now. How I will never forget that day of blurriness filled with tears.

emotion

slow streams of tear drops
hiding, failing, trembling into the pillow
with so much to say the tears mopped
up all emotions into a pale
and rung it out

steal away, steal away, steal away with me
to sea across the bearing straight away

Is there something I can say?
Something I can do?
To imprison the day
from appearing come morning
To keep this moment with you

the day will rise and fall
the sun will appear
the moon will shine
But the sun and moon
may never share the the same sky.

No Bra Today

Since I became the epidemy of what " White Feminist" fought so hard to break out of,

the ingenuous invention of the bra, became my O.C.D. along with my girls.

Yes, I said Bra and I mean breasts.

Of course they sag directing us towards the equator.

The ariola or " Deeper melanin in our skin which surrounds the top of the boob" area grows bigger as they migrate south. While in composing the whole boob. Since we live far north of the equator would means the consideration of magical full cup size that points at you whether or not it actually is winter.

Suck my penis Feminist!

September 15th, 2009

The recession is technically over!

In the last two weeks I have heard more and more news about a predominately, not just in quantity but also power, has documented goals to become an Anti-racist organization. They actually have a Taskforce that stands more than just for Affirmative Action but as a taskforce consisting of administration members therefore the decisions made is implemented throughout the entire organization. I applaud the consistent persistence regardless of what lawsuits, accusations, and consequences occur. I hope they can inspire and be pioneers as being a best practice model for systemic social change to other organizations. Go Resource Inc.!

We have White men taking lead in accepting racism as a White problem!

Immigration

I attended a meeting the other day that was a positive step forward to many more steps that still need to be taken. I couldn't help but notice that I was one of the minority again. Welcome to my life! This meeting was so important I was wondering where were all the other groups or droves in numbers? It was disappointing to me. I then started to add up all the factors that come into play.

I started thinking about a conversation I had with a family member who lives in a very White neighborhood and how others in the family were starting to follow suite. I was being looked down upon because I chose to stay in the city itself. I listened to all of there reasons which only started to sound like words White people who could afford to move to such an area could consider. Yes, Hmong people have and will continue to do well, but at what cost. Will we be like every other immigrant/refugee families who had to change their names, drop their language, drop their accent, and their traditions for what? So we all can sound the same to avoid being treated unequally.

Maybe if we moved to where they are, we will be more like them and therefore treated more like them. Maybe if we send our kids, who bear the names of non Hmong students, then they may have an equal chance of making it to achieving that imposed upon idea of the American dream. Little did they know they would be stripping their children of who they are and those values that have made it through generations of turmoil from China to Laos. A small nomadic tribe was able to survive a country such as China should be proud of themselves and not ashamed. My nieces and nephews will grow up to be assimilated true American Hmong adults and not Hmong American adults who can live as our fore fathers and mothers did, biculturally.

Little did they realize that this urban sprawl was one of many major policy in our country that had lasting consequences we minority citizens suffer from daily in all systems.

First Day of School in Minnesota Fall of 2009

It's the first day of school and the President can't make a speech to U.S. America.
He's not supposed to empower those who will take care of me in my elder days. No wonder why they don't value elders' wisdom for we don't value their own.

I guess those social justice issues I work so hard against isn't supposed to
actually amount to much when the President can't speak to our children about politics,
when the only other side of what we call democracy
can't even try to understand where youth today sit on the views of those same issues,
let alone get their jobs done.

How long can this mighty nation function standing on fear to rationalize, perpetuate, and abuse this power to silence our President for speaking to children but not to silence a President who spoke of war? If this is the message we really want our children and youth to learn and hear and then believe we maybe asking ourselves these questions for time to come.

March 15th, 2009

What a beautiful day! I see that Spring is coming very soon...
which means it's time for changing of the old to new
ugly to dazzling
death to life
Time of change...
Living in this destitute of a short season makes us appreciate life four times a year

What do you do when you are scared to make that change? What makes it better? Maybe watching the seasons change one season at a time will ease the pain and memory.

I read The Shack by William P. Young last year and just got it back and thought to share this wonderful book to everyone.


I am currently reading a book about bees, which I will say more when I am completed with it in its' entirety.

Monday President's Day

Please don't be afraid of my anger.
Please don't be afraid of my passion.
Please don't be afraid of our differences.

Please don't mistake my anger as hate but for frustration of the cycle of oppression.
Please don't mistake my passion to be feared but as intense desire for justice.
Please don't mistake our differences for we are all part of the systems that uphold our history of racism. We are different because one race may uphold unearned privileges over other races, but oppression belongs to us all, as a problem and to come up with solutions to never repeat what our ancestors practiced and then passed onto us.

Kia Moua

January 9, 2009

Since there is a sign of a Earthlike planet we can now ignore global warming and stop arguing if it's even real anymore. I come from the school of thought that we can not go and ruin another planet when we have not learned to function as if we all are affected by one another's actions and inactions.